The Saddest Goodbye - January 22, 2014

Nearly fourteen years to the day, our house became a home with the addition of one tiny Yorkshire Terrier puppy.  For weeks we had driven past a sign on Route 59 advertising the sale of Yorkies.  I begged and pleaded with Artie, but he kept saying no.  One day, whining again as we drove past the sign, he gave in.  He told me to call.  We visited the home on 59 and walked in to see a tiny, very shy but adorable little ball of fluff.  He hid under the table, but I scooped him up and from that moment on I was in love.  We took him home and deliberated what to call him.  Wanting to come up with a proper British name, "Guinness" came to me.  Artie liked it, and so it was.  It didn't matter much to me when I learned a few weeks later that "Guinness" is an IRISH beer, but by then the name stuck and we loved it.

Having had two very large adopted greyhounds prior to this little ball of fluff, we fell instantly in love with this frisky, big eyed, Teddy bear nosed little powerhouse of a dog.  Part of my begging ritual to Artie when I was trying so hard to get this dog, was that I wanted a "Purse Puppy".  Guinness was never really that dog.  He wasn't content to be a froo froo.  He was rough and tumble and thought he was much larger than he was.  He was playful, funny, bossy, completely uncooperative with housebreaking, and we loved it all.  Guinness took over the house, but mostly took over our hearts.  We often said that our house and our bed were indeed Guinness' and that he let US live in them.

Over time Guinness continued to bring us joy in the simplest things - getting a toy when he wanted to play, barking at his bowls when he wanted food or water, curling up in our laps when he wanted to be cuddled, expecting his afternoon snack on time and vocalizing to remind me when it wasn't.  And oh, there were those days when he barked incessantly, sometimes for no reason known to us.  And the way he snarled when someone stepped on him.  Guinness always amazed us with how he could be in a room full of people and stay out of harm's way.   We loved it all.

In May of 2013, following routine blood tests, it was discovered that his kidney values were abnormal, indicating early onset kidney disease.  At that time the vet asked us to monitor it.  We tried special food, but Guinness would have no part of it.  We continued to keep an eye on him and nothing was changing or getting worse.  He seemed to be drinking more water and having trouble controlling his urges to urinate.  We attributed it to advanced aging and thought little of it.  Recent blood tests indicated his values had elevated a bit, but were still OK.

On December 3, 2013 Guinness turned 14.  We celebrated yet in some ways we dreaded that birthday because it meant he was closer to leaving us, just based on average longevity of dogs.  When his birthday came he seemed very healthy, except for some hearing loss and a little less energy, and we heaved a sigh of relief and joy.  Unfortunately within a couple weeks that all changed when he somehow injured his ACL and developed a pronounced limp.  Guinness had arthritis and we usually picked him up and put him down when he was on the couch.  Apparently he jumped off in our absence and hurt himself.  Surgery became an option but we decided to wait it out.  Small dogs often heal from this type of injury and he eventually seemed better.  Around Christmas time our little angel began having gastrointestinal issues and we began a series of vet visits.  He was given many meds but didn't seem to improve.  Our vet suggested he be hospitalized because he wasn't eating or drinking.  Guinness spent three days in the hospital, getting IV fluids and meds.  The vet at the hospital told us Guinness' kidneys were filled with cysts, and those cysts would eventually shut down his kidneys.  There was no way to know how long it would take, but we knew we wanted to bring him home so he could be comfortable and in less stress.

When he was finally cleared to come home, he was a shade of the vibrant little dog he was.  Artie and I decided to continue with IV fluids at home, and injected him twice daily.  Each day he seemed better.  Yesterday he was almost his normal self and we spent a great day together.  I kept him at my side on the couch, took him with me when I left the room, and just enjoyed being with him.  That all changed this morning, when he seemed to deteriorate.  We called the vet and they said to get him in immediately.  In our hearts we knew we had to make a decision.  In the car on the way there we decided it was time to put an end to our sweet baby's discomfort.  Friends told me that if we loved him we had to let him go.  Guinness left us peacefully on his little bed in the vet's office, with Artie and I both holding him and telling him how much we loved him and what a wonderful dog he was.

If you have ever loved an animal you know what a void is left in your heart when you say goodbye.  I have never loved an animal like I've loved Guinness.  There will never be a dog like him again.  He was loved by many and I just know he's taking over Heaven right now.  I am hoping he found his way to my Dad so they can cuddle together for eternity.  Someday I will see him again to get more of those daily kisses I know I will miss so much.

Goodbye sweet Guinness.  You loved so unconditionally and so completely and we hope you know we loved you with all our hearts.